S5 Ep 12 starts out with Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member Kyle Richards at her store, preparing for a gay mixer that she has been talking about since last season. This is not any gay mixer; it is for her “gays” and the women and their “gays”. Like they were prize possessions. Seriously ladies get a grip on this “my gays” thing.Another game night? Really? Anyway, she proceeds to chat away with a couple of “Game Event” producers. Ok stop me right here, the endless references to their “gays” was one thing, but having yet another “game” night…have you totally lost your mind Kyle? Did you forget these game nights never go well? Did you already forget Eileen’s poker night last week, last Ichecked poker is not just something husbands do to their wives in the cover of darkness, but an honest to goodness game. Well, let the games begin.. again. More on that further down.
Yolanda and her hubby, David Foster, are planning a trip to Italy. She easily has $20,000.00 in just luggage. When I pack, it is a one bag affair. She once again talked to her son Anwar, who she has kept in hiding from us and is now displaying proudly since she has set her two daughters on their path to fame as Sports Illustrated models. So as we said she is off to Italy leaving yet another kid home alone. Wow these women have short memories.
Speaking of son’s, Lisa Vanderpump and Ken are concerned about their adopted son’s plans to find out more about his biological parents. He is only asking to find out his ethnicity right now but if he starts the search, you know he will want more. Strangely, Lisa is stopping him. I have no idea why she would want to do that. She doesn’t seem like the insecure adoptive mother at all. See, you never really know a person. But since this episode is called Drama Queens, I am going to go with her creating drama for some unknown, or known reason. Bring it Lisa, we are dying to know.
Back to drama, in the form Kim Richards who was in the hospital for 5 days after the fight at the poker party (game night, hellooo). She seems fuzzy at first, about just how long she was there. She says “maybe 6 or 7 or 8 days. I can see how the first two were a blur. Brandi Glanville is of course front and center for that drama camera time, and is hell bent on discrediting Kim’s sister, Kyle. She is pushing in a big way and poor, deluded Kim believes that Brandi is her friend. I want to shake Kim. Hard, really hard, rather than just my head. Because you see Kyle and Kim were talking earlier that same day and it appears that they have made up but true to form, Brandi manipulates Kim. Brandi acts as if she is saving Kim from Kyle (I told you last week she thinks she is Kingsley’s stand in). Maybe it is just hard to see Brandi as a concerned and caring friend because she has burned so many bridges. Her version of every scenario comes through a booze fog. No wonder her version of almost every story is so different from everyone else’s, including her slant on Kim’s relationship with Kyle and it isn’t pretty. Oh and did we mention that Kim invites Brandi to the gay mixer!? Well we almost have to excuse Kim, since she did seem to be in a fog.
Ok, let’s get on with the fun and drama.. the night of the gay mixer. Everything starts out fine and it looks like everyone will be having a good time. Well not really, it all seems a little awkward to me, “here meet my Gay and be off with you” .. really? Lets FF to Brandi and Kim, coming to the event together. Brandi actually thinks she was invited and Kyle clearly believes that she did not invite Brandi (remember we said she was talking about this since last year, well guess who was there at conception!?) Probably Klye should have called her and told her point blank that she was not welcome. If they ever did anything that sensible, we would have no show.
So, there is Kyle, being the hostess with the most-est and in walk Kim and Brandi. OMG, can you say awkward??? And we thought the parading of the “gays” was awkward. Now all the ladies are saying my isn’t this “awkward” and looking for cover as there is sure to be fallout. Lisa Rinna and Eileen Davidson are watching from afar seemingly dropped from another planet into this seasons mess.
Then the fun starts because Brandi actually has the balls to walk up to Kyle for an obviously very fake air kiss. Can I just say that I could never do that? At at this point as they are talking I can’t stop staring at their faces, and all that “shine” their make-up artists have slathered on their cheekbones and up into the temples, it was blinding I tell you, like snow in sunlight. I was so distracted by it that I almost missed Kyle, apologize to Brandi for touching her arm at the last game night. Next thing you know, Brandi has the nerve to try and discuss the reason that she is there, which I wasn’t entirely clear on other than to cause drama. Naturally that doesn’t go over well and the bickering starts. Poor Kim, in her usual fuzzy state, tried to tell Kyle that the reason Kyle didn’t get a heads up about Brandi attending the gala is because it would be better if they just saw each other, and in a Kumbaya moment, hugged it out and made up. Uh, uh. Not happening. They start to argue in front of everyone and then move off to a quieter place to continue the argument. At some point Brandi hurls her first insult at Kyle, saying Kyle is an “attention whore” and a “bitch”, talk about projecting Brandi! Kyle asks Brandi to butt out and says that she would like to speak to her sister. I cannot believe that bitch can’t take a hint. Then, Kyle says, “you aren’t wanted here” and Brandi says, “Neither are you, ask your husband”. Very, very low blow. Very low….
With that comment, I have to say that I would have lost it. Not sure what I would have done but it would have been over for Brandi and any attempt to reconcile would be impossible.
Now, the screen just says, “to be continued”. Seriously!? Why do we continue to torture ourselves with this show? I guess we like the torture.
** as an update to the “My Gays”, the fabulous #Andy Cohen later schooled the ladies on Watch What Happens Live, “think about substituting my ‘blacks’ in that sentence and see how that works for you Ladies”. With that I snorted pop through my nose and we all know how that takes the fun out of everything.
To be continued……..